In relationships with other people we often struggle when we as a member of a couple have disagreement with our partner. Sometimes it helps to look at a situation with a different set of eyes. So often when we have a disagreement or a falling out with our partner we look at the situation with the mindset that our partner did something to us. Thinking that our partner did something to us is the easiest, and likely the most familiar way to look at a situation. Perhaps a better way to look at the situation would be to look at the situation would be to think of the disagreement is something that has been created between the couple. Looking at the problem with the eyes that it is a situation that has been created by both partners may be a better way to address larger issues surrounding a disagreement. As if we look at problem as a situation that has been created rather than being something that has been done to us opens us up to more solutions. If we are able to set aside immediate differences we can learn to be more flexible in finding resolutions. Your partner should also do the same. This way you both can be involved in finding resolutions. In addition to being open to more resolutions, you can also cast aside petty issues you may have with your partner, and view them in larger terms. For example, you and your partner may have a larger problem, why let things like who left their shoes out get in the away of solving a larger argument. If you are looking to keep up with a relationship you will want to look at things long term. At times that means setting aside petty arguments for the greater good of the relationship. One way to promote a relationship and keep a relationship on the right track, is to look at problems at not what the other person did to you, but rather as a situation that has been created between you two. This eliminates the need to blame one person for situation, and it also helps not to make a situation 100% any one person's fault. So next time you have a major disagreement with your partner, consider approaching the issue as a problem that has been created between you two, and see what happens. |
