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Index Page › News & Media › Spirituality & Religious Issues
 

Here's Help for the "I Can't Say 'No' Blues"

 

Author: Kimberly Chastain

I hear it all the time.  Cries from Christian women who want desperately to serve the Lord, but who feel overwhelmed.  I almost dread going to PTO meetings or church services anymore because I just know somebody else is going to ask me to help with something, they say. Dont get me wrong.  I want to help, but there are only so many hours in my day.  I feel like Im just going to explode if I dont get some relief.

What usually follow these statements are apologies.  Im sorry.  I dont mean to complain.  Ive been blessed with so much that I have no choice but to give back.  And I really am glad to do it. Anyway, as a Christian, Im obligated to say yes when called on to help.  Plus, if I dont do it, it simply wont get done.

Does any of that sound familiar to you?  Have you found those same statements coming from your own mouth?  Do you rush around all throughout your days doing for others whether you have time to do it or not?  Do you cringe whenever the phone rings and the voice on the other end starts with, Let me ask you something?  Do you have too much stress, not enough time, and a boatload of guilt for feeling the way you do?  Then you most likely suffer from I Cant Say No Syndrome.

The Bible Says Its OK To Say No

While your intentions are probably good, the effects of your actions often turn out to be horrendous.  Your husband fusses that youre running yourself ragged.  Your children complain that you have no time for them.  You gripe under your breath about everything because youre so sensitive.

Are you aware that its all right to say no?  In fact, the Bible says it is OK to say no.  Jesus, himself, clearly took time to rest as can be seen in Mark 4:38 among other passages.  Even the son of God (in human form) knew His human body, mind, spirit, and soul needed a break from time-to-time.  You, too, are expected to rest and take care of yourself.  How else can you make your body a living sacrifice a temple as the Bible instructs?

Feeling Guilty Is Biblically WRONG!

This is a real shocker to most people.  In cases like these, Satan, not God, uses guilt to sway our actions.  Psalm 69:5, Isaiah 6:7, Isaiah 27:9, and countless other passages of scriptures refer to the sin of guilt.  Jesus died for our sins.  That means, when we repent of our sin, it is wiped clean.  There is no guilt.

Satan often uses the ploy of false guilt to overwhelm us.  Dont let him work his tricks on you. This is nothing more than an attempt to keep you trapped and feeling depressed about not spending every minute of every day doing something for someone else.

God doesnt want you run down and tired all the time.  How can you effectively serve Him if you barely have enough energy to get out of bed?  Why would He want someone praising Him who is disgusted and cranky?  Walking the tightrope of I Cant Say No is not Gods idea of a fruitful life.

There Is A Better Way

Take time for yourself.  Have you ever been on an airplane?  Do you remember the spiel the flight attendant gave before take off?  It went something like this: In the event of a decrease in pressure, an oxygen mask will fall from the panel above your head. If youre traveling with an older person or child, please secure YOUR OWN mask first so that you may better assist your travel partner.  Even the airlines know you have to take care of yourself before you can effectively take care of anyone else.

Pray about the things people ask you to do.  Actually wait for an answer from God before you give an answer to the committee chairman, the scout troop leader, or whoever else is asking for your help.  Others will respect you when you tell them youll pray about their request especially if you really do it!

You are not trapped.  There is a way to overcome I Cant Say No Syndrome.  The first step is admitting you need help.  Once you do that, youre open to living a freeing and more peaceful life than you ever thought possible.

Author Bio:
Kimberly Chastain is a proclaimed scripter. Kimberly likes to write articles about this topic.
You can also reach this article by using: religious news, religious issues, religious social issues, religious product news
 
 
 

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