"Would you call his house and ask if I am there?" Now why on earth would she want me to do that except possibly to check up on him and see if he is there. After asking, I am able to confirm that that is exactly what she wants to find out. She has not heard from him yet today and is feeling insecure. She does not use those words, she is not thinking that clearly. Willing to admit that she is feeling "jealous", I have to calm her down and explain that the only person she has to feel jealous of is dead. After all, "he" is 62 years old and has only been a widow for about a year. Yes, this is a phone call from my mother, NOT my 16 year old daughter, although the next phone call could have the same content with different players involved. The scenario gives "The Sandwich Generation" a new twist. I knew that being sandwiched between taking care of my Mother and my children was going to involve my time, my finances and my energy. I was not ready for my energy to be sapped by giving dating advice to both my daughter and my mother at the same time. Getting my daughter through her first heartbreak was also heartbreaking for me. Even though she ended the relationship because she caught the boy lying to her, she hated that she "hurt him" and she cried all night. Mom on the other hand discovered that the most recent boyfriend could not commit to having dinner each night, never mind commit to a relationship with another person. Mom was ready to commit to having an exclusive relationship. He was not ready and after dating for six months he broke it off. She was crushed and she cried all night. I am never quite sure which loved one I will be loaning a shoulder to cry on, who will want a hug because they just met the latest "Mr Right". At this point I am just ecstatic that my 89 year old grandmother has no interest in dating - I do not have the energy for a triple-decker-club sandwich! |
